Warning Sign
by fphp
Summary: Neela does some thinking...post From Here to Paternity


_Notes: Hi! I'm a big Coldplay fan and I thought this song fit Neela at the moment (post- "From Here to Paternity") perfectly—I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. This will most likely stay a one-shot. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to ER or to Coldplay, unfortunately._

Neela's head was resting gently against the back of the couch, a blanket softly covering her as she gazed blankly out of the window. It was two o'clock in the morning, and she had been this position since Ray dropped her off after work earlier that night. Neela was still in her work clothes; she had not even eaten dinner. It was as if his kiss had set her mind reeling in directions that she had tried to suppress for far too long, and now that those thoughts reigned freely, she found herself unable to shut them off.

Neela knew she was in a mess, but the extent of it didn't hit her until Ray forced her to see the mistakes she had made over the course of almost a year. And that realization hit her the moment that Ray's lips softly touched hers.

_A warning sign_

_I missed the good part, then I realized_

_I started looking and the bubble burst_

_I started looking for excuses _

All of the things Neela had pushed to the back of her mind called out to her all at once. Her excuse for moving out had been that she was married and she should be past sharing a bathroom with Ray's friends and one-night stands; the real reason was that she didn't trust herself around her best friend.

_Come on in_

_I've gotta tell you what a state I'm in_

_I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones_

_That I started looking for a warning sign_

Neela didn't even know when it all started…maybe it was a gradual thing. She and Ray were so different, and yet the foundation of their friendship was the strongest she had ever experienced. Ray knew her better than even Michael did—she had just never admitted it to herself.

_When the truth is, I miss you_

_Yeah the truth is, that I miss you so_

_Running away solved nothing_. Pushing Ray away had done nothing but cause the both of them pain and the loss of a friendship that they both cherished. Instead of dealing with the mess her life had become, Neela had only delayed her time of reckoning. It took a physical blow to her senses to bring Neela back to the reality of her situation.

_A warning sign_

_It came back to haunt me, and I realized_

_That you were an island and I passed you by_

_And you were an island to discover_

Perhaps the most heart-wrenching thought Neela now had was that she never realized how incredible Ray was _as a person_. He was a remarkable doctor, a distinctive musician, a loyal friend, and her crying shoulder all at the same time. _Not a lot of people can pull that off. _

_Come on in_

_I've gotta tell you what a state I'm in_

_I've gotta tell you in my loudest tones_

_That I started looking for a warning sign_

The "ethical alarm system" (as Ray so adequately put it) in Neela's mind had gone off at the realization that she loved spending time with her roommate more than anything else—that was her warning sign. But she now realized that warning signs can be deceiving—the moment she left Ray's apartment, her life had gone crashing down.

_When the truth is, I miss you_

_Yeah the truth is, that I miss you so_

She saw Ray at work almost daily, but that didn't ease the constant ache in her heart. Neela didn't know what that ache was until a few hours ago…the pain had seemed to melt away as soon as Ray leaned in towards her. She took a deep breath. The next thought that came into her mind was the first she did not try to suppress: _I wish he was here with me now. _The blank look on Neela's face was replaced with a resolute one: she was going to be completely honest with herself. But what did that mean? _It means…that I love Ray._

_And I'm tired, I should not have let you go_

A loud knock on the door jolted Neela from the maze in her mind. She walked to the door and opened it. At three o'clock in the morning, Ray was standing in her doorway dripping wet, a look of exhaustion on his face. He had clearly not been able to sleep either.

Neela was done thinking, analyzing, and feeling guilty. As if through pure reflex, Neela jumped straight into Ray's arms as he stood on the threshold of her apartment. A tiny tear escaped her eye as she breathed in his scent. _That's what home smells like_. Ray buried his face in her hair and smiled.

_So I crawl back into your open arms_

_Yes I crawl back into your open arms_

_And I crawl back into your open arms_

_Yes I crawl back into your open arms._

For the first time in her life, Neela felt free.


End file.
